I’m asked this question all the time: “Why am I attracted to people who are wrong for me?” And the answer is quite simple, actually:
Because your wounded self is doing the attracting.

feeling gone.

beware of picturing yourself in a relationship as the unselfish, giving one who sacrifices everything for the other. This is a blatant ego game in which the ultimate purpose may be to gain control over the other by manipulating feelings of obligation

live in Christ

   I have to write something here... and keep encourage myself to live in Christ. believe in christ, this is truly amazing. When I feel upside down about my original emotion, God bring me back, the song, the words, the prayer...it's all helpful like my first time try to recover my sadness experience... it's hard to bring yourself go into right position by you own, and you know, life is always already bring you down, so! God is my first choice to living in love.

''That kind of love is emotional in nature but not obsessional. It is a love that unites reason and emotion. It involves an act of the will and requires discipline, and it recognizes the need for personal growth. Our most basic emotional need is not to fall in love but to be genuinely loved by another, to know a love that grows out of reason and choice, not instinct.''
___ The five love language.

I would not accept the bull shit anymore
I know how weak it looks like
there is no more mercy
I want dead
dead is only things I recognize you
I'm not interested
but it's my first time recognizing what is love


the curious fearful fragile powerful girl is mine
you wont get her

the secret and the political

I lost my interest and vivid
I know I will be healed from my strong enemy
You wonder why
I think I'm not
Where are the stores goes through
Right, I will be strong
Strong enough
Strong enough
Where is your story go through

living in my mystery
I know how was it inside of me

It's no different between them
The outside is kind
but I'm sick of getting old

There is no truth anymore
and here is the life